


your guilty heart (don't let it break you)

by sakurasgf (sanacult)



Category: Naruto
Genre: Fix-It of Sorts, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Uchiha Sasuke-centric, basically everyone filling sasuke in on the fact that narutos in love with him
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-10
Updated: 2020-02-10
Packaged: 2021-02-28 01:13:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,989
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22655299
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sanacult/pseuds/sakurasgf
Summary: Sasuke wakes up after their final battle. Suddenly, everyone feels like visiting him.
Relationships: Uchiha Sasuke/Uzumaki Naruto
Comments: 20
Kudos: 233





	your guilty heart (don't let it break you)

**Author's Note:**

> this is my first naruto fic i wrote in one sitting because these two wouldnt leave my head. hope you like it<3

Pain takes over his body when he wakes up. He opens his eyes and blinks a few times to adjust to the light hospital's white walls make even brighter. It feels like he's twelve again and just got a curse mark. 

He tries to sit up but he's missing his arm and is still weak, so instead he just settles higher on the pillow. It's then when the memories of the events that put him here come back to him, and he wishes he'd stayed unconscious for longer. Wishes he hadn't woken up. 

He remembers what Naruto had said to him and vice versa word by word, and the sentences pierce him through like knives, echoing in his head. His moves during the fight replay in his mind like a movie, filling him with shame and anger. He groans and that's when the door to his room opens. Sakura is standing there, frozen. 

A bunch of emotions flashes through her face; happiness, relief, sadness, _disappointment_. She finally puts on a neutral expression, something barely mimicking a smile and comes closer to his bed. She looks tired; there are dark bags under her eyes and her face seems thinner, cheekbones more visible. She grew out her hair; it looks messy, like it got longer purely because she didn't have time to cut it. 

"Tsunade-sama will check up on you right away. How are you feeling?" 

She knows he won't answer, but she tries anyway, tries to make it seem _normal_. The green glow of her chakra lights up their faces, making them even more pale. She checks the basics, writes some down and then she's out again. She heads straight to Tsunade's office on the third floor. She doesn't need to say anything; her master knows, of course she does. 

When the Hokage enters his room, he wants to say that he doesn't need to lay here, that he will be fine on his own, that he's going to leave Konoha anyway so they don't have to care about him. "How long have I been unconscious for?" comes out instead. 

"A month," she deadpans, the green chakra going over his body again. "Both of you. He woke up three hours ago." He involuntarily tenses up. He doesn't want to talk about Naruto, not yet (not ever). Not when the memory of their fight is still fresh in his mind, when it burns him. 

"He's fine," she adds, and he almost rolls his eyes. It's Naruto, _of course_ he's fine. He could probably come back from the dead with that awful determination of his. The green light finally disappears and as if she's reading his mind, Tsunade speaks, "You have to spend three days here, in case something happens. After that, do whatever you want." 

Her tone is cold. So is her gaze, as if she's blaming him for something and he knows what she means by that. He knows she treats Naruto like her family, knows at how big of a risk he put that family at because of his own selfishness. Knows she's not the only one who thinks like that. 

He requests no visitors before she can exit and closes his eyes. A stupid thought passes through his mind, that maybe next time he opens them, he will really be twelve again, fresh after getting his curse mark, and all of the things that happened were just something he dreamed about during the coma.

* * *

When he wakes up a day after, Kakashi's sitting on the stool right next to his bed. He wants to say that he doesn't want visitors, but then Kakashi tells him about all the consequences he'll have to face for his own damned stupidity. He doesn't flinch when he hears about the possibility of a death penalty. 

"Maybe it's the best solution," he thinks out loud, then fixes his gaze onto the covers. Kakashi has the audacity to _chuckle_. 

"I don't think Naruto would allow that, especially after what he went through with the Raikage and his people." Kakashi's smile fades as soon as he sees his brows furrow. He figures Naruto didn't get the chance to tell him everything at the valley. 

So Kakashi fills him in. He tells him about Naruto letting someone beat him up, about his panic attack, about how he kneeled in snow crying and begging for mercy. All for him. 

They sit in silence for a moment, and then the older man speaks, "I can't help but think how if we cared more about both of you, you wouldn't have to go through that." He looks a few years older than when he last saw him on the battlefield. Probably feels ten years older himself, too. "Maybe if i saw your problems earlier and helped you through it, got revenge out of your head—"

"But none of you did," he interrupts. He doesn't need to hear something he already knows. "None of you did, because the jinchuuriki and the last Uchiha were a nuisance you hoped to get rid of somewhere along the way. You all noticed us only when the village's future relied on us, one way or another." He lets the words drip from his tongue like venom and he can't help but think he sounds similar to Orochimaru. 

He knows it's not entirely Kakashi's fault, knows it's Sandaime's (and whoever else's that agreed with him) work, but it's Kakashi who's been the first adult in his life after the massacre, not counting the teachers at the academy. Someone who was supposed to be like a family to them, someone who was supposed to see something was wrong, someone who was supposed to _help_ —

"I'm… I didn't really mean what i said at the bridge back then." Kakashi shakes his head. 

"It was like a wake up call for me." 

And then he's gone. 

Sakura comes in a few minutes later and states she's here as a _medic_ , not a friend. She checks up on him, helps him go to the bathroom. Then she looks where his arm should be. 

"Tsunade-sama called up a team. They're working on prosthetics for you and Naruto. They should be ready in a few weeks." 

He shakes his head. "You can tell them I don't need one." He doesn't. He doesn't _want_ one. He knows it means nothing in comparison to all the things he did, but he decides it's going to be a part of his redemption. 

Her eyes widen. "What do you mean you don't need one? Your left arm was _blown off_. You can't use the bathroom properly, yet alone perform any jutsu. Stop being so hard on yourself, Sa—"

"Sakura, _please_." She here's something in his voice (or the fact that he said _please_ alone) that makes her shut her mouth immediately and put her hand on his shoulder. 

She sits on the stool Kakashi left empty and looks down. After a while, she starts again. "You know, when I found you two on that rock, I didn't know if I wanted to finish you off or use all my chakra to make sure you'll make it out alive." Her voice comes out quiet, like she's scared to tell him this. 

"I never chased after the two of you because I was in love with you or Naruto." She looks up and there's something like relief written on her face. "You were— _are_ like family to me. With many issues, but a family." This time her smile is honest, and he wishes she did finish him off for all the pain he's caused her. "And i wanted to save that family from falling apart no matter what."

"I know you and Naruto have a bond none of us will ever understand." He tenses up. She's right, and both of them know it. "But I thought that maybe if I stayed close enough, I'd be able to form something like this with you, too." She laughs bitterly. "How stupid." 

He wants to say something, but the words are caught in his throat and he figures it's going to be a long process for both of them: apologizing and forgiving. He knows they already had that exchange when she found them at the valley, but it wasn't a proper apology. 

He's going to try anyway, because he won't let her and Naruto's efforts go to waste. His fingertips graze over her knuckles. "Thank you, Sakura." There are tears in her eyes and she opens her mouth to say something, but another medic enters the room and says they need her for an emergency. 

She stands up and sends him the widest smile he's ever seen on her face, and then the door closes. So do his eyes because, apparently, consequences of one's actions are very tiring.

* * *

The next day _Iruka_ _sensei_ out of all people visits, promptly ignoring his request of no guests. He doesn't try to argue; his teacher would stay either way, and he needs rest. 

Iruka sensei brings him his favorite onigiri. "I figured you might want some. No offense to the hospital food." 

He nods his head and takes one. It feels weird. He knows the man treats Naruto like family too, probably even more than Tsunade does, so why is he so nice to him? It's because of him that Naruto has been in a coma for a month, it's because of him that Naruto doesn't have an arm. It's because of him that the majority of Naruto's life has been wasted. 

"How are you feeling?" sensei asks, and he finds himself suddenly willing to talk for the first time since he woke up. 

"It's… getting better. Physically." Iruka nods his head. 

"That's good. I managed to visit Naruto yesterday." He already feels tired. He doesn't want another heart wrenching conversation, doesn't want to sit still not knowing what to say again. But he also can't tell the man to get out. He sighs in his head, then braces himself for another confession. 

"He's very busy. Kages, daimyos and even normal civilians are visiting and thanking him all day long." He figures it's only natural; Naruto was the savior of the world now, an international hero, the future hokage. 

And he was a worthless piece of shit that tried to ruin that world and managed to hurt dozens of people. If there was a word opposite of hokage, he certainly fit the title. He didn't deserve to live, didn't deserve to exist in the same world where Naruto was happy, because all he ever did was bring him despair. 

"When I asked him how he feels about it all, he said it's thanks to you." He freezes. "I don't think you realize that you were always his driving force, the reason why he didn't give up." Iruka sensei smiles, of course he does. He feels like he's in a dream that he'll wake up from in a second. 

"When you left, Jiraiya—" he notices how Iruka almost spits the name out "—tried to tell him he's just making a fool of himself for wanting to bring you back. And you know what he said?" He shakes his head. Iruka laughs. "that'd he'd rather be a fool all his life if it means bringing you back home." 

"And when he found out your chakras are compatible, he told me the same day that he's happy that he can make you stronger if the need arises. He mastered a completely new jutsu in the span of a few days because of you. Maybe if you didn't leave the village, he'd never be as strong as he is now." Iruka is smiling the whole time, while he feels his face gradually become even paler. 

"I should be leaving now, before Shizune-san scolds me for sneaking food in." He stands up. 

"Iruka sensei." He tries to ignore the way his voice cracks. "Thank you. And… I'm— I'll try to fix everything." The older man just smiles even wider. 

"Good luck."

* * *

His third day goes without any visits that would shake his world up even more than the conversation with Iruka sensei did. He only needs to go through the night without any problems and once his trail is done he'll be able to gather his things, say his goodbyes and leave Konoha for good. 

But when he comes back from the bathroom in the evening, he sees blonde ruffled hair, pyjamas in frogs and a wide, toothy grin and time stops. 

" _Naruto,_ " he manages to say, breath suddenly knocked out of him.

"Sasuke." he smiles and sits on the bed. 

Sasuke sits down too. The image of Naruto without one arm ties a knot in his stomach because he knows he's the cause of it. But Naruto is going to accept the prosthetic, just like he's going to accept the hokage's office and he's going to live the life he always wanted. 

"I'm sorry I'm visiting just now, I've… Become a bit popular in the last few days." 

"It's fine, Iruka sensei told me. Everyone wants to meet their savior themselves, right?" The words suddenly come easily to him and Sasuke thinks that Sakura was right about their bond. It's only him and Naruto now and he knows he won't be judged, won't be looked at with cold, hateful stares, won't have to strain himself in order to maintain a conversation. 

"I think I've gotten at least fifteen marriage proposals from different princesses in the past three days." He laughs. "I've already been called Lord Sixth by so many people too."

"Isn't this what you wanted?" he asks. 

Naruto goes silent. They stare at the wall before them. Sasuke notices how much warmth radiates from Naruto, as if he were a small sun. It's not an uncomfortable silence, but he doesn't like it. Naruto being silent is never good news. 

"I… Don't know. Ever since I was a kid, all I talked about was becoming the hokage. But now, after everything that's happened… I might not be the best person to be in power." 

Sasuke stays silent. Naruto shifts on the covers, then grabs the hem of his shirt and plays with a thread coming out of it. 

"I just wanted to be seen. To tell them _Hey, this punk you all hated is the leader now_. But now I'm seen and I wish they could forget about me, because they see me as a political strategy instead of a person." 

"And I've done so much only to get you back home, not because I thought it would bring me closer to hokage's chair," he adds and Sasuke's breath hitches. "Though I tried to tell myself bringing you back would mean I'd make a good hokage." 

"I plan on leaving the village as soon as my trail is done. I want to travel, see the world in a way I couldn't when I only had revenge on my mind." Naruto's head turns to him so fast that he almost breaks his neck. "You need a break, right? And you don't know if being the hokage suits you." 

He realizes how close they are when Naruto's breath tickles his face. The bluish glow moon sends through the window makes him look _stunning_ , even in his stupid pyjamas and messy hair. His eyes seem to stand out even more, unanswered questions hiding behind them. Sasuke looks right into them and shuffles even closer. 

"Then come with me," he whispers, and Naruto sucks in a breath. "Once we come back, you can decide what you want. Although your grandma seems to be in her prime." They both let out a laugh. 

He wants— He _hopes_ Naruto agrees, hopes they can sort everything out without any prying eyes or ANBU agents. before he can stop himself, he speaks again. 

"I want to be your friend properly this time. I don't want to have any regrets, like when I left you at the Valley of The End for the first time." Naruto's eyes widen. Sasuke continues, "You never gave up on me, and I don't want to give up either this time." 

He backs away at the intensity of Naruto's stare, but doesn't drop eye contact. It feels like the blue eyes see right through his soul, searching for answers to the questions that were never said out loud. When he seems to have found them, Naruto leans in and stops an inch before his face. Sasuke wants to lean back again, but something keeps him in his place. 

He feels Naruto's hand on his face. Their noses are almost touching, Naruto's eyelashes tickle him. "Can I kiss you?" he whispers, and Sasuke's world stops. 

It all suddenly comes together in Sasuke's mind; Naruto's words to him, what Kakashi and Iruka sensei told him earlier. Why their bond is so difficult to understand for others, why Naruto calling him a _friend_ made him frustrated. He supposes he'll have time to think about it in more detail later. 

He nods, not trusting his voice at all. When Naruto's lips touch his, he forgets everything around him. The place where a hand rests on his cheek burns, the warmth emitting from the latter feels a thousand degrees warmer. His lips are surprisingly soft. He gets the urge to tangle his hand in Naruto's hair, and he does, making it even messier than before. 

He doesn't want the moment to stop, because he finally feels whole, like the part he's been unknowingly missing since their first fight at the valley came back to him, but even they have their limits. When they break off for air, Naruto rests his forehead on Sasuke's. 

He smiles so wide Sasuke feels like he's right next to the sun. He feels corners of his lips quirk up slightly too. "Was that a _yes_?" 

Naruto laughs, then nods his head. 

They'll be okay, he thinks. As long as they're together. 

**Author's Note:**

> yeah i totally fucked up that one but alas. sasunaru are in love


End file.
